The Agony of Decoversion (A Quote)

Just some food for thought this Monday morning.  From the book Faitheist: How an Atheist Found Common Ground with the Religious:

I wanted to believe in God.  I wanted to love Jesus and participate in his fellowship of believers.  I looked to many Christians as pillars of goodness, and I wanted to emulate their compassion and social justice ethic…I earnestly believe that, to be like them, I needed to believe in their God. It seemed to be a package deal, but I was much more invested in the positive, human-affirming ethics and the community aspect of it than I was in that theism…It was kind of heartbreaking, then, when I realized that I no longer believed in God…It was if I had come home from an especially long week at work to find out that God had packed up His things and moved out days before without leaving a forwarding address, and I’d just been too busy to notice His absence…Letting go of God was difficult.  Even as I began to step up my antireligious rhetoric at college, I privately mourned God.  I wanted to believe and was disappointed in my inability to do so.  I missed Him – and the community and ethical commitments that came along with Him.


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